Have you ever known, or know one or more now, who are like the Pig Pen character from the Peanuts comic strip where there is a shit storm going on all around them. Something is always going wrong. Someone or several others are always taking advantage of them or finding fault. There seems to always be someone that is out to get them.
It is part of the drama triangle which includes the victim, the persecutor, and the rescuer. This is a game that has no winners. Regardless of which of these three roles I might play, I lose. Believe me, I’ve played them all and even became proficient at each role.
But what I found after wising up to the game was that stepping outside of the game is where joy is. As I let go of any of those roles, I gain peace. In fact, joy and peace come automatically. They always come automatically when we let go.
The drama triangle is tempting. It is easy to participate in. You listen to someone’s sad story and your heart wants to rescue them, or your inner parent wants to counsel them to a better place, your inner fear wants to persecute them, but realize this, as this is done from the mirage of the heart or the nurturing falsehood or disgust of the mind, I am in the game. As I am in the game, I go from role to role to role. I begin to crave rescuing people or playing the victim looking for sympathy and comradery, finding others to blame, to persecute and complain about.
The best thing that can happen to us is an awareness that we are in the game. Once we see we are in the game, we have an opportunity to step out of the circle of influence of the game. We can turn away and right there we are free of the game and in peace and joy.
This game goes on at work with co-workers, the owner or supervisor, other managers, customers, vendors, and others. It goes on at home with spouses, relatives, children, neighbors, friends. It goes on in our mind as we seem to be thinking all by ourselves going from one role to another in our minds about something we did or didn’t do, should have done, shouldn’t have done, might do, want to do, questioning ourselves, cajoling, feeling sorry for ourselves, and well. . . I’m guessing you know what I’m talking about.
The answer is always the same. Play the game, or step away from the game. Having become quite good at the game, I found that the joy and peace outside is infinitely superior in every way.
How About The Joy Triangle Instead: Joy, Peace, Love. That’s A Glorious Game!
Spread Some Joy Today–by creating your own Joy Triangle.