“The wise man. . . If he would live at peace
with others, he will bear and forbear.”
— Samuel Smiles
“Let us ever remember that our interest is in concord,
not in conflict; and that our real eminence rests in
the victories of peace, not those of war.”
— William McKinley
My joy and amazement increases in ways I didn’t expect. After all, it is so very common to defend our position, even when we are the ones who have failed. We do this by seeking blame and inventing vain excuses meant to sound legitimate and provoke sympathetic understanding at the least, and forgiveness and consolation at best. In many ways we have grown into expecting the worst of people we may have to deal with, especially in unpleasant circumstances. This creates an ongoing feeling of fear and dread and it multiplies creating adversaries.
Such is the way it was with me a good deal of the time and as it is with many that I know and have known, yet it need not be this way, and the “I’m ready for the battle” mentality is not productive or encouraging.
Today, I had a situation where I needed to handle something that I have ignored too long and it would have been easy to handle some time back, and now has escalated to something more. So, finally, I decided to handle it. And guess what? It was a piece of cake. It was even pleasant!
I wasn’t surprised, but I was very pleased. As I practice my own calm confidence and loving attitude, I find more and more that the people I talk with are the kindest, most helpful, even encouraging souls. Of course, part of the difference (maybe a big part) is the way I approach it. I don’t go it looking for a problem, but a solution. I may even enter apologetic for causing them grief and sincerely want to take care of the issue and redeem myself. Then, they seem to always want to help. Isn’t that cool?
So, now I am noticing today how many times this is happening in my life now. It was a interesting revelation. All of a sudden, I realized that this is now happening all the time. Even people who have righteousness on their side turn out to be kind and helpful because I don’t make silly excuses. I freely admit my error and my willingness and interest in resolving the issue. I accept responsibility for my actions and for trying to resolve it.
Avoiding resistance, allows me to be relaxed and calm and loving and interestingly, the person in front of me is mirroring that too. I even help put smiles on their faces. It’s a far better outcome and a much more pleasurable journey.
It’s Ever True: What Goes Around, Comes Around.
Spread Some Joy Today–Take someone out for lunch or coffee. Do some catch up.