It’s so easy to get upset by what someone says to us verbally or in writing. It seems to be our initial reaction when we hear it or read it. Of course, even when we know that is not the real us, it is our ego, it requires practice to pause and respond rather than to immediately react–even if we were alone when we received the critique.
From David R. Hawkins’ outstanding book, Letting Go: The Pathway of Surrender, here is the complete quote from which I gleaned the piece above:
“The truly humble cannot be humbled. They are immune to humiliation. They have nothing to defend. There is no vulnerability and, therefore, the truly humble do not experience critical attacks by others. Instead, a truly humble person sees the critical verbalization by another person as merely a statement of the other person’s inner problems.”
If I think about it, it seems completely unfair to automatically accept a critique as an attack on me. I could ask, “who are they to criticize me?” But, I know all too well that for me to criticize others has been such an easy thing to do. In fact, it would be an automatic immediate reaction when I see something that is outside of my core beliefs. Unless. . . I have practiced surrender to judgment. And, what an absolutely valuable, proactive, and character-building practice that is!
Once I have surrendered being judgmental of others, I must also include surrendering to being judgmental of myself, for it is in judgment of myself, that the opinions of others and critiques gains traction.
Can this surrender really happen? Well, all I know so far is that understanding what is happening is most helpful, then practice is essential. My practice is helping to change me from a reactionary to an observer, but I have a lot more practice ahead. The good news is that I am totally aware of my ego and how it likes to rant and rave and control things, and the really good news is that I now know that I am not my ego and I am in total control when I decide to be.
Practice Makes Perfect? At Least, It Makes Better.
Spread Some Joy Today–by allowing love to rule in your life.