“At this very moment, you may be saying to yourself
that you have any number of admirable qualities.
You are a loyal friend, a caring person,
someone who is smart, dependable, fun to be around.
That’s wonderful, and I’m happy for you,
but let me ask you this:
are you being any of those things to yourself?”
–Philip C McGraw
Most of us have probably been trained since childhood to think of others first. Parents have a way of instilling this “getting along with others is the ideal thing” idea. We may have even been trained in the so-called Christian ethic of forsaking ourselves for the benefit of others. Women in particular are often trained to be submissive by putting their family and/or spouses first as a moral security in keeping things together and functional. We may have even been taught that pampering or paying attention to ourselves is selfish, especially if we do this ahead of our prime directive of thinking of others first.
At some point in our lives though, we realize that though we may keep all the balls in the air with the best of them, we are broken and tattered inside. We’ve looked outside of ourselves to get reinforcement through praise and love and may not have received that which we have craved.
It’s time to ask ourselves, how is that working out for us? Probably not as good of a plan as our well meaning teachers, preachers and coaches put forth. It is most likely high time that we gradually and consistently let go of that old, worn-out, ill-fitting plan for a far better one of taking care of ourselves first. Yes, first.
As we follow our own desires, our own internal guidance, our own lining up with our source, though our resulting well-being, we can be the better servant, encourager, supporter, friend and lover. We will also be far better leaders and teachers for others and hopefully stop the propagation of these old broken ideas of self-sacrifice being some moral ideal. As we love ourselves, we open a floodgate of love possibilities. As we appreciate ourselves, we multiply and expand our appreciation of every one and every thing around us. It is without a doubt the best place to begin.
It’s Not Only Okay To BE ME, It’s Okay To LOVE ME.
Spread Some Joy Today–As always, it begins with us. Seek and allow your joy and in your joy, it is automatically shared. Remember that your joy is not dependent on anything anyone else says or does, but only on what you think. You have all the power, and the only power.