Yesterday I talked about letting go as I was describing emotional health in a sales person. Of course, it is true for every person on the planet. But, when it comes to things that we deem important, like money, many people hang on tighter. To them, the struggle, the resistance is worth it. I want my money! They tricked me. They stole from me. They overcharged me. It’s not right! I loaned them money and they stiffed me. On and on it will go with that resistance. Some might think that this is not resistance, and they would be incorrect. It certainly is resistance.
When I was growing up, I experienced a lot of financial trauma from my parents and step parents, and others. I wanted a different path and I did that for the most part, like when I was in my twenties and I co-signed a loan for my sister and brother in-law. When they defaulted, I took it over. I wasn’t thrilled with it, but I knew what I was getting myself into. For most of my life I’ve accepted responsibility that way.
Later in life, I had financial troubles of my own in different spots in my travels. I ended up defaulting on others. So, I understand how these things can happen. I can relate, we might say.
With all my studying, and then going into my own business, I decided that I would not have a collection department, nor would I turn anything over to a collection company, nor would I spend very much time trying to collect money owed us. That is all a whole bunch of resistance. It isn’t worth hanging on to.
We have had a number of clients leave our services leaving a balance, and sometimes a significant one based on what we charge for our monthly service. Yet, since we charge for the month up front, if we allow it to go further into the future, that is our own decision. Certainly, they owe the money. That’s not even up as a question. We let them know where they stand, and we always try to work it out so that it is as easy as it can be to get caught up. We’ve gone way out of our way to work with people because we care about our clients.
Still, some just ignore us. When I feel that I am swimming upstream so to speak, I tell the bookkeeper to write it off, and I send the client a kind note thanking them for their business and that their debt has been erased. We even have some clients where I believe so much in what they are trying to do that I have been known to donate our services for an extended period hoping that it might make a difference for them to get back on their feet. Once I release the money, I have my joy back. If I decide to continue without payment, I have my joy back. I love my clients. Every one of them. I don’t want this issue of money to change my feeling.
I can relate where they may be at, and it is all my own doing to continue services without payment over whatever period of time. We could use the money, but more important than this is that we cannot afford the resistance that comes from extended collections. I just let it go and move on to something I can build on. Moving forward is what keeps us growing, so I avoid the rear view mirror.
Some might say, well, that is small numbers probably, but what I sell is large numbers and I couldn’t let that go. Not true. It’s a choice. And, it really doesn’t matter the numbers big or small, not really. It’s all resistance. We know what we are getting into in business when we do what we do, so we are in the mix, but like a post a few days ago about being in the car and being angry at some driver doing something crazy, it doesn’t matter what they think of us, what matters is what we think about them. If we are upset, that is on us, not them. As I said, I love my clients even after they leave, so the only way for me to keep my feeling there, I have to let go of the rest. It matters more what I think of them in that way than what they think of me or my company.
Now this “no resistance” theory that I practice now doesn’t just apply to business. It covers a wide area of life. Consider what you’re holding on to hoping for a change, wishing for it to be different, focused on the pain of it, the unfairness of it, and that story just gets worse the more it is told. All of it is resistance, and all of that resistance keeps us from moving forward, so we get stuck in the past. What’s worse is that we’re focused on what we don’t want in lieu of the beneficial focus of keeping our thoughts on where we are going, why we want things, and much more.
I wouldn’t sue anyone for anything. Abraham said it well at a Buffalo, NY workshop on September 27th, 2000: “In most lawsuits, most people just use each other as their excuse to disconnect from the Stream. And then they just suffer until the one who is the least disconnected wins the lawsuit. But it is still an exercise in disconnecting from Source Energy that we think is never worth the price of the reward, no matter how great the reward of a lawsuit is.”
They said something similar in 1998 at a workshop in San Diego: “If you decide to make someone the enemy and you’re pushing very hard against them, you don’t affect them at all, but you disconnect yourself from the Stream. If someone cheats you, they cannot diminish your experience. They only diminish their experience. You cannot be diminished by someone cheating you unless you get all upset about being cheated and push against them and use that as your excuse to disconnect from the Stream [of Well-Being; our connection to Source Energy, or God].”
Here’s To Your Own Letting Go Of Resistance, And To Your Emotional Well-Being.
Spread Some Joy Today–by recognizing when you are tense, frustrated, not feeling good, and finding the way back to your joy by letting go. Release it all. Now, go spread that joy!