Category: Response

Attitude Is Relative

“It is ironic that one of the few things in this life over which we have total control is our own attitudes, and yet most of us live our entire life behaving as though we had no control whatsoever.

By our attitude, we decide to read, or not to read. By our attitude, we decide to try or give up. By our attitude, we blame ourselves for our failure, or we foolishly blame others. Our attitude determines whether we love or hate, tell the truth or lie, act or procrastinate, advance or recede, and by our own attitude we and we alone actually decide whether to succeed or fail.”

— Jim Rohn

I have always loved how graphically attitude can be seen in an airplane, even if all you could see were the instruments. The picture above is called an artificial horizon instrument and it graphically shows your airplane’s attitude relative to the horizon. The yellow in the middle is the plane, the blue is the sky, the brown is the earth. Push the nose down, you see mostly earth, pull it up, mostly sky, turn right or left and it shows that visually. Level flight is just like the picture shows now.

Our own internal compass, or rather, artificial horizon, demonstrates our own attitude relative to all that we navigate through. It may not be earth and sky, but you get the idea. Straight and narrow is good. Feeling good is good. How we feel is our true artificial horizon. By knowing how we feel, we know where our attitude is and what to do to correct or improve it. All we need to do essentially is to pay attention and be interested in feeling better.

They say, ‘Attitude Is Everything.’ I think that is a fair statement. A better one might be that how we feel is the best indicator of our current attitude.

The Spring Of Kindness

“No kind action ever stops with itself.
One kind action leads to another.
Good example is followed.
A single act of kindness throws out roots in all directions,
and the roots spring up and make new trees.
The greatest work that kindness does to others
is that it makes them kind themselves.”

– Amelia Earhart

Ain’t it the truth!

One of my favorite authors who really helped me get going in sales way back in ’72-73 is Frank Bettger. His book, How I Raised Myself from Failure To Success in Selling, is a classic and is very encouraging for someone new to sales (or a veteran in sales, for that matter). In it, he talks about getting fired from a professional baseball team because he looked like he had no energy and he seemed to be dragging the team down. So, he decided to change and to become the most enthusiastic player anywhere and he created the popular phrase, “to become enthusiastic, act enthusiastically!” This became his central theme and I have several copies of his signed books, all of which say “Enthusiastically, Frank Bettger.”

The quote above is very similar to me: To become kind, act with kindness! Ain’t it the truth. We already know it. We know when we act with kindness that we feel great and can see on the face of the other that they feel great too. The thing we don’t see is how that great feeling is passed on by that other person throughout their day or even into days ahead.

I try to remember to give sincere compliments wherever I go, to people I see, whether for the first time or the hundredth time. I am always looking for something to compliment people on. Many times, there is no discernable reaction to my comment, but I am sincere and it feels really good to me, so that is all that matters. I know, they heard it, and they appreciated it even though they may not show it immediately. And, again, the best part is that it not only has an effect on them but on others they interact with throughout the day. How cool is that?

Sometimes I do this in bulk and in what some might think are “crazy ways.” I’ll give you just one example that I remember as a bit off the chart. I was a sales manager at a small fledgling dealership in 1989. It was gloomy and struggling. I wanted to inject some life into it and did a number of things that helped. They had a fairly strong service business. Matter of fact, that was what kept the dealership afloat.

So I had this crazy idea come into my head to give a dozen roses to all the employees (13 of them) and have a blank card on it, so they could take it home and pass some of the pleasure on to their spouse or loved ones or just enjoy it themselves.

It was a bit crazy because I didn’t have much money, but I broke out a credit card and bought 16 dozen roses of all different colors, one dozen each in vases, arranged and delivered. It was $660. I couldn’t really justify the expense when my reasoning tried to stop me, but, I was jazzed and I acted immediately. I had each employee stop by the office on their way home and I had them choose one they liked and I thanked them for their service to the company. For all they knew, the company bought them. I also gave one set to the General Manager and Owner who worked at a different location. Plus one to take home with me for my wife.

You had to have been there to see the looks on all their faces. It was priceless. And, guess what happened when they went home. I am sure that it was a hit there as well. In addition, it is the kind of gesture that you so rarely see. It was worth every cent and then some.

And guess how happy that florist must have been.  One action and so many are positively affected. It is like spreading joy!

I was only at that store for three months, when a marvelous opportunity came to me unexpectedly. Is there a correlation? It was an opportunity that changed my life, and that is still with me to this day, 31 years later!

Many times, I get thoughts like this and I am happy that I act on many of them even though some are a bit over the edge like this one. But, you know, life is all too short, and to miss an opportunity like that would be to miss an opportunity to love.

I call those thoughts inspirations. Typically, right after you get one, your reasoning facility takes charge to try to justify that thought using logic and reason. The typical result would be letting the inspiration go down the drain.

If you ever have any of these strange, yet wonderful inspirations, I hope you act on them. Think of the joy that you will create for yourself and many others! I think that is a great reason! And, you never know–that act of kindness might have an interesting side effect… on all concerned!

We Are Complicit. I Am Complicit.

We are all complicit in whatever reality that we are experiencing whether inside our own thought-realm or outside our body in anything that we see, hear, or feel. Because we are complicit, we have the authority and responsibility in our dominion. As we are seeing, hearing and feeling that which is before us, we are involved in it to one degree or another, and we are at the same time in choice; albeit, the choice may seem to not be something purposely chosen. Yet choice it remains.

Transforming History By Transforming Words

One of the most powerful things that I learned from Anthony Robbins was how impactful our choices of words can be on our perspective of things, people, and events. Words can help change our state of mind, our attitude, our outlook for the better or for the worse. More often than not, our word choices are habitual and unconsciously stated and so tied to our history or collective history for their meaning. Much of this was dictated and is being dictated to us in an effort to influence our thinking and more importantly, our behavior.

Words definitely have power; however, they only have the power that we give them through the meaning we assign them or accept from others.

Periodically, I like to change common words to evoke a whole different feeling than those words used to have for me. Here is just a few I wrote down the other day:

Faults. I don't have any faults. I may have idiosyncrasies, but I don't have faults. There is no one to blame. We are each unique. Faults becomes idiosyncrasies. [I especially like this one!]

Good. A better word for good is aligned. I am in alignment. I feel as if I am resonating in alignment. I feel aligned. Resonating is also delightful choice.

Bad. Nothing is bad. It is only feels a bit off or amiss. Bad is such a harsh word. Amiss is soft and fuzzy. A bit off is out of kilter, a bit wobbly, etc.

Right. This word holds so much history. Anytime we can eliminate this word may be very helpful. Rather than right, it is appropriate.

Wrong. Another massive history word. Rather than wrong, it is askew or out of alignment. This change takes all the negative power away and leaves so much room for improvement and change.

Evil. Such a harsh word. So much history. It is like the maximum bad. But what it really is is unpleasant. It feels unpleasant. They seem to be unpleasant to me.

Left or Far Left. Such political baggage. They are not that. They are port and portside. Of course, for the right we could use starboard.

Justice. Nothing but history attached to this word. What would be more appropriate? Review. It is only a review. Or, it might even be a re-view.

Judge. Way too much history here too. Change this word to interpret. Change judgment to interpretation.

Peace. Great word but so misunderstood. A better choice I think is unity.

War. About the harshest of actions on the planet ever. Change it to contention or uncontentment. We aren't at war with them or that country, we are in uncontentment.

So, this is just a thought-starter for your transformation. And, I think that transformation is a good word for what can happen when we begin to use different words for things in life that are overloaded with historical meaning. Enjoy your lighter adventure!

How Does It Feel? Vibration Rules.

“Everything is valid and everything is truthful, because Law of Attraction lets everything be. The question is not whether it’s right or wrong, whether their approach is right or wrong, or whether my approach is right or wrong. The question is: Does their approach feel good to me? And if it doesn’t, then I choose a different approach.”

— Abraham, Esther Hicks

Reaction vs Response

There is a vast difference between being aware of negative emotion and reacting to it. Awareness allows enough space to recognize the value of the guidance that emotion is showing us and then allows us sufficient time and thoughtfulness to choose a response. The length of that space is not important. It is enough. When we react, we are thoughtlessly allowing the emotion to rule our actions. In reaction, there is always some sort of mess to clean up when the reaction is done.

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