Category: Kindness

Living A Half-Full Attitude Toward Fullness

“The reason things 
always work out for the best, 
is because this is actually 
the highest of all spiritual laws. 
 
Any apparent exceptions 
are simply evidence 
that the work is still in progress.” 
 
— The Universe, 
aka, Mike Dooley 
 

[Classic post from 4-8-16]

As with so many things that we allow to be, the message above from Notes From the Universe came at a perfect time with the perfect message for me today.

So much of life is attitude and perspective. The glass can be half full or it can be half empty and both would be correct; however, they feel very different, and each perspective leads to a different result. And, though I feel that I was brought up by my parents in a half-empty mindset, I have endeavored throughout my adult life to have that half-full attitude of my life and to live it and teach it.

One could say that the half-empty mentality is living in and moving toward lack, while the half-full mind would be in appreciation of what is already here on their way toward abundance. And so it is with all of us in how we choose to view our daily lives and activities. 

But, what if the highest spiritual law–that law that God insists we have owned from birth–is true? Then the second part of Mike’s quote above is indeed the glass half full attitude. “Any apparent exceptions. . . ” Aren’t there always exceptions? I think there are always exceptions, and it is how we see, think, and thereby feel about those exceptions that determine all for us. “Any apparent exceptions, are simply evidence, that work is still in progress.” Amen to that! It’s on its way! I asked and I received and now it is in progress! How cool is that!

It is such a powerful tool toward happiness to develop and practice the attitude that things are always working out. It is one of the perfect affirmations to state many times throughout the day, “Everything is always working out for me!” Or, “Everything is always working out for our company!” Or, “Everything is always working out in our world!”

This one is going on my wall this morning.

As I Remember To Remember This Perspective And Attitude, I Am Renewed And Regenerated. 

Spread Some Joy Today–by seeing your glass half full and glowing.

Allowing The Best Within Us To Shine

“To belittle, you have to be little.” 
 
— Kahlil Gibran 
 

Here’s To Being The Best That Is In Us And Helping Those Who Desire To Come Along. 

Spread Some Joy Today–Think LOVE.

The Difference Between Compassion And Sympathy

“We only have what we give.” 
 
— Isabel Allende 
 

[Classic post from 6-15-16]

I had a thought and wrote it down the other day to contemplate it further. Here's what I wrote: What's the difference between compassion and feeling sorry for someone?

Etymologically speaking, there is little difference. Com-passion is to be with or be together in pain and suffering. The original use of passion was in reference to the suffering of Christ at the time of the crucifixion, hence the name of that massively popular Mel Gibson movie. Much later it was used to describe sexual desire, and later still, in the number one slot on Dictionary.com, it is, “any powerful or compelling emotion or feeling, as love or hate.”

Then compassion, in the way I've come to understand it, and I have a large amount of company, is to love another unconditionally in their current situation. It's no longer about having pity for them, as in feeling sorry for them, or sorrow for them, and it is certainly not about feeling their pain or suffering directly as in sympathy. It is more like recognizing the other, seeing that they are perhaps in a situation that is not the best for them while holding them up as in prayer for their healing and well-being.

So then, feeling sorry for someone is to have pity on them and compassion is to pour love on them. Other than thought and feeling, either of these may contain action or activity; however, I would want only to receive that action that is accompanied by compassion.

The Dalai Lama XIV said it well: “A truly compassionate attitude toward others does not change even if they behave negatively or hurt you.”

I think that a feeling sorry attitude wouldn't care in the least.

“There Is No Exercise Better For The Heart Than Reaching Down And Lifting People Up.” — John Holmes 

Spread Some Joy Today–by carrying compassion with you in your heart.

To Be Christlike Is To Love Unconditionally

“Resentment 
is like taking poison, 
and waiting 
for the other person to die.” 
 
— Malachy McCourt 
 

[Classic post from 6-7-16]

I'm guessing that the Bible has been interpreted in so many different ways as to be whatever anyone wants it to be or to say. It is also probably the most quoted book in all of history. As well, there are many facets of religions that surround and attach themselves to parts of the Bible. In addition, the Bible has been used in healing and as a weapon, as it also has brought people together, and held them apart. As well, it continues to be those things today.

I was thinking about Christianity in general, and Christians specifically, partly from some reading of late, and mostly from personal interaction and experience in the same time frame.

It is said that a Christian is a follower of Jesus of Nazareth, termed The Christ, and known with the combined first name and the job description (Messiah or Christ) as Jesus Christ. And from my limited church training, I was to understand that to be a Christian is to be a follower of Christ (Jesus) and that the ultimate objective in this is to be as “Christ-like” as possible. In other words, to become as Jesus taught–to become like Him.

In all my studies of the Bible and countless other things, it has been my interpretation that to be Christlike is to love unconditionally. To love our enemies, to love our brothers and sisters, to love our neighbors, to love the less fortunate, to love ourselves. When I think of Jesus, I think LOVE. To me, He is the embodiment of that which is love, and not just any kind of love, but agape love, or what I term as unconditional love. To love in spite of. To love in lieu of. To allow others to be as they choose for themselves, without any insistence that they satisfy me.

It's a high goal. It's challenging. We might think it is more challenging today with all that is going on in our instant communication world, but I think it has always been challenging. It requires a choice–to choose to allow, to love, and to forgo ourselves, and by forgoing ourselves, I don't mean to be selfless, because that often takes away loving ourselves. What I mean by forgoing ourselves is the last line in the last paragraph: To allow others to choose for themselves, without any insistence that they satisfy us. That IS unconditional love.

So, when I see or hear of Christians, and especially those who have claimed that for a long time, or leaders in their church, who are resentful and angry at other people, tearing down the other's buildings so theirs can be the tallest and so much more, I wonder what their definition of being a Christian is. And, of course, this doesn't just apply to Christians, but all people really.

To see brothers and sisters at odds with one another because of something as simple and yet so powerful as a thought. And when that thought is thought often enough, it becomes a belief. As it becomes a belief, it guides our actions, as all of that determines our character. It is sad to see the separation of people in this way, but it is their choices that I honor, whatever they may be.

If I could be even the tiniest influence to those that I touch, it would be my ultimate objective, passion, and desire to remind people of the depth, joy, and reverence of unconditional love. And, that to be Christlike is to be that, live that, spread that, and grow that love–practice that. Because, I really do think that when it all comes down to the basic foundation of all of life, it is love that is the energy that runs the entire show, and as we line up with the vibration of that energy, we thrive, and as we are out of harmony with it. . . well, that is the rest, isn't it? Or maybe the word is unrest. 

If Jesus Is Love, If God Is Love, Then We Are Love. 

Spread Some Joy Today–by being willing to practice allowing the joy within you to touch others today, and every day.

Being Fully Alive!

“The Glory of God
is 
a human being fully alive.” 
 
— Saint Irenaeus 
 

[Classic post from 5-29-16]

I was thinking about platitudes, and then along comes this quote above. Seems to fit perfectly in my mind as a platitude. I mean, what is that all about? What did Saint Irenaeus really mean by saying, “fully alive.” I’m assuming that he meant something more than having a pulse and breathing in and out. But, what exactly? What does it mean to be fully alive?

Maybe it means something as simple as enjoying our life. Would a Christian early church leader who died in 202 A.D. say that? Hmmm. I think not. Would it mean to be more giving? Giving more? More loving? Loving more? More devout? More enthusiastic?

Maybe it is knowing our priorities and following through. Or maybe it was to be more physically fit, strong, and/or healthy. Perhaps it means to be more active in the community–a valued participant in affairs outside our own little world. It could be that fully alive means to love God more, or even recognize there is a God.

Who knows? It’s one of those phrases that sounds like it is saying so much, and being so profound, and yet, nobody knows what it means. People may even go around repeating it, and others might think that they know what it means, afraid to admit that they don’t get it. How many times have we done that in our lives? I know I certainly have.

So, what it comes down to is that, in my opinion, the phrase to be fully alive doesn’t mean anything, unless you give it some kind of meaning yourself.

Go For It. Make Your Own Definition Of What Being Fully Alive Means. That Will Be What It Means. 

Spread Some Joy Today–by feeling fully alive? Maybe. Maybe that’s where joy lives.

Love Is Always The Perfect Choice

“You are defined 
by who you love, 
not who loves you.” 
 
— Gratefulness.org 
 

[Classic post from 5-27-16]

Another way to say this is, we are defined by what we give, not what we get. I like how Alan Cohen puts it: “The more you align with your values, the more people and things you value will align around you.”

Perhaps another way to say it is that when we are giving, when we are loving, when we are allowing, we need not be the least concerned about what comes back to us in quantity or quality. And, I am sure that whatever quantity and quality it is will be more than enough.

Can someone be loved but not loving? Certainly. They could stay in that unloving state for their entire lives if they wanted to, but that doesn't change the fact that they can be loved.

And that's where it is. It is in our loving of the other, regardless of anything, that says who we really are. I suppose you'd have to say that the opposite is true too; however, I would have to add that this is the way they are choosing to be, but not the way they really are. When we get down to who we really are, there is nothing but love.

Love Is Always The Perfect Choice

Spread Some Joy Today–by choosing to let the real you out for a while.

The Soil Of Appreciation

“The roots of all goodness 
lie in the soil of appreciation 
for goodness.” 
 
— Dalai Lama 
 

[Classic post from 5-25-16]

In other words, appreciation feeds the roots and grows the plant or tree of our good. In better words, whatever you want more of, find a way to appreciate that wherever you see it, and if you don’t see it, imagine it.

Sometimes this seems abnormal. For example, the way to find a better job, or one you like instead of the one you don’t like, is to find appreciation for the job you have. To many, that makes no sense. What makes more sense to them is that they should hate their job more in order to motivate them to make the change. Force the change might be a better way to phrase that.

But, the reality is that this only makes us more miserable, and we end up attracting more of that feeling from other aspects of our life. This isn’t working, that isn’t working, this sucks, that sucks, leading to a life sucks attitude or an unworthiness attitude. I don’t deserve things to work in my favor because these things are happening to me. This is just the way things work out for me (powerlessness), and more.

Now, here’s the cool part. Just look at the last few paragraphs. How does the first one feel compared to the next two paragraphs? When things are not working out and we’re feeling down and maybe even sprinkled with some unworthiness and a dash of powerlessness, generously slathered with some fear and blame, are we feeling appreciation for those things? Are we happy they are here? Hell no. We’re pissed off and rehearsing the gathering storm of our unhappiness.

Then maybe in some out-of-our-true-minds-way, we really are appreciating our unhappiness. In other words, we are feeling justified in it, getting comfortable with it, finding other things in our lives and in the world that supports it, like being right and everything and everyone else is wrong, justifying our blame of the other or circumstances, and a long list of supporting information.

Maybe you’ve met or known some people who seem to appreciate their unhappiness by continually attracting more of it in many different ways. It’s a whole bunch of feeling sorry for themselves, with the world against them–me against the world and all that fantasy turned reality.

Continuing with the cool part is to open our eyes and our mind to what is going on. What are the fruits on this tree? How does it feel? How do I want to feel? What am I appreciating? What am I accepting? Who am I blaming? In what ways am I justifying my position? My emotions? Is this what I really want? Or, would I rather have goodness? Would I rather feel great? Would I rather have everything working for me than against me? It’s all about what we are appreciating or focusing on. Appreciation is simply focus. Value is focus. Worthiness is focus. So are their opposites.

What Are You Appreciating? 

Spread Some Joy Today–by being in your joy. Joy is a state of being. Be there.

Being An Example

“It is very beneficial 
and also quite easy 
to learn from others 
by virtue of their example. 
 
It is far more beneficial; 
albeit, often a challenge 
to learn from my own example.” 
 
— Albert K. Strong 
 

[Classic post from 4-5-16]

As we see with our eyes, we are looking at what is in front of us, and if we simply pay attention to what is going on, especially in conversations and interactions with people, we learn by their example. What we learn has to do with what we are seeing. What we are seeing has to do with where we happen to be at the time. It’s easy to learn from others if we are open to that idea. Not from their knowledge, but from their actions.

Learning from our own example is a bit more challenging, yet far more beneficial because it is representing an accumulation of our beliefs, attitudes, and knowledge. We often are not paying attention to our own example, but others are–especially children, co-workers, employees. So awareness of the example of others is valuable, and awareness of our own example is paramount.

The last several days and weeks I’ve been paying much more attention. From all that I have learned from Abraham, Esther Hicks, and many others, we often pay so much attention to ‘what is,’ or what is happening in front of us visually or otherwise, that we get further away from what it is that we want because of our focus on what is, which is more often than not, what we do not want.

Abraham said, “In your action, you lose sight of the vision, you lose sight of your trust in the process, and you just bang around in a sense of futility. Hold the vision and trust that the Universe will acclimate to your vision. Hold the vision and trust the process.” They add, “Hard work is not the path to Well-Being. Feeling good is the path to Well-Being. You don’t create through action; you create through vibration. And then, your vibration calls action from you.”

I’ve noticed lately certain people around me talking so much about what is, what the problems are, all the roadblocks in the way, uncertain of how their desire will be accomplished in a steadily worsening atmosphere, where they feel somewhat powerless to make it happen as they would like. At every opportunity, they talk about the process they have been going through and all the issues that confront them, and yet, they keep trying.

I’m quite certain that you have heard and experienced the same kind of thing from certain people in your field of awareness. If we are paying attention and knowing there is a better, more effective way, we will not participate in these conversations. Yet, we often do. This is where learning from our own example is more challenging than learning from the examples of others.

Lee Iacocca popularized a management statement: “Lead, follow, or get out of the way.” If we are to be a good example to others, we must lead. If we are to be a non-example, we follow, and if we are loving, but uninterested in sharing the pain of others, we can simply and profoundly, get out of the way.

When someone around us is talking incessantly about ‘what is,’ and by being aware, we can easily see this is not a beneficial thing to them and those around them, the best example we can be is not to spend time or energy discussing what is with them. We can’t just start talking positive stuff because they’re in a place where that is just an irritation. But what we can do is not participate. As we sit there, we can be sending loving thoughts, seeing them in the place that they want to be, and at the same time, if we are unable to move the subject elsewhere at the moment, we can find a way to get out of the way, excuse ourselves, go somewhere else, and continue our loving thoughts at a distance. 

It is so important not to keep discussing the problems and the questions that we don’t have answers for. It is all for naught. It has zero value. All that does is keep us focused on what we do not want. If we are to move, and at least be an influence toward others, we must find ways to feel good by focusing on what is good, what is right, what is valuable, what we want. That will be our example.

My Grandmother Said It So Well When I Was Very Young And It Has Always Applied As An Excellent Example: Count Your Blessings. 

Spread Some Joy Today–by your shining example.

What’s The Difference?

“What’s the difference?” 

— A popular lament of children 

when I was a child 
 

[Classic post from 4-11-16]

It is way better than, “who cares?” Probably better than, “so what?” Then there’s the, “whatever. . .” Light years ahead of, “who gives a _______?” The enlightened version by Eckhart Tolle might be, “Is that so?” The knowledge-seeker might say, “And, how is that important to me?”

Well, you get the drift. There are a lot of ways to respond to what others or some authority is saying is good for us, something we should do or be, advice in all forms.

And yet, there might be something to learn here that could be so valuable as to change my life forever. Then a helpful and insightful response might be, “that sounds interesting. Tell me more!” 

But, really, how often have we done that? Probably not very dang often–at least based on my own memory.

One is eager and open and all the others are suspicious, protective, and closed.

Does it really hurt to listen and be interested in learning something? Generally not; however, we have so much going on within ourselves, who has the time?

I like the point of view of curiosity. “What can I learn from this? How can this be of value to me or others? I might find a tidbit that will lead me to something that has grand value.

What’s the worst thing that could happen? I would spend some time. I might end up saying, “I can’t think of anything that I can use here right now, but I came and I heard, and the value may become apparent later.”

We Bring Our Attitude Or Point Of View Along With Us Everywhere We Go. But We Can Negotiate As We See Fit. 

Spread Some Joy Today–by listening to new ways to find joy. Maybe you’ll find more than you knew was available.

Pushing Our Emotional Buttons

“When it feels to you 
as if someone is pushing your button, 
realize that you are the one 
with a great big button out there 
that is just begging to be pushed. 
If you don't put it out there, 
no one will push it.” 
 
— Abraham, Esther Hicks 
 

[Classic post from 4-10-16]

I've heard many people (including myself!) who have said things like, “He/she pissed me off!”, or “That just pisses me off.” or, “Who the hell do they think they are treating me like that?”, and a long list of angry reactions to some stimulus from another.

But, it is never the other that is causing the reaction. That's the excuse we use because it puts blame away from us. Our ego loves to blame everything except ourselves. Yet, it is ourselves. The stimulus is only an opportunity for us to express what is already inside. 

As Wayne Dyer has remarked (my paraphrase), when you squeeze an orange, orange juice comes out, and when you squeeze a person, what is inside them comes out. The stimuli will allow us to release a reaction and that reaction contains what is already inside of us. That might be anger, hatred, disgust, prejudice, revenge, jealousy, guilt, or any number of volatile thought-based negative emotions.

It could also be different. Instead of a reaction, it could be simply awareness. Or, it could release compassion, tenderness, understanding, unconditional love, or any number of thought-based positive emotions.

In all cases–all cases–it is our thoughts within ourselves that are creating the emotions or feelings we are having, and all of that dictates a reaction, a response, or simply an awareness. We are totally in control at all times. And, because we are in control, we are choosing to think those thoughts and follow through with whatever actions or lack of action we are choosing. People can only push our buttons and get a reaction when we allow that to happen. They have no power over us except that which we give them. 

Next time you read something, see something or hear something that pisses you off, remember that this reaction is from you, not them or it. Remember that it is what is inside you. Ask yourself if that is what you want inside you? Ask yourself if this is the person you want to be? Acceptance of that is fine, but blaming others or conditions for that is not because it isn't true. If that is not what you want, only you can change it, and you have the power within you to do so at any time.

One last bit from Abraham, Esther Hicks: “You can be happy or sad, it doesn't matter. You get to choose. You can go this way or that way. You get to choose. Figure it all out as you go. There's not one right path. There are many right paths. Do anything you can do–which means think it or speak it or do it–that makes you feel a little better.” 

How Does It Feel? Do You Want To Feel Worse, Or Do You Want To Feel Better? Hmm. Good Choice! 

Spread Some Joy Today–by letting all that upsetedness go. Reach for a better feeling thought. Joy is in that direction.

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