Category: Kindness

Words Do Not Teach. Experience Does.

“It is one thing to hear a concept
and feel the resonance of it when you hear it,
and it's another thing altogether
to practice it until you own it, to be it.”

— Abraham, Esther Hicks 

[Classic post from 4-19-18]

It is so easy and goes down so smoothly to read or hear about unconditional love and feel good about the idea of that, and yet, it is a whole other thing to actually practice it in our lives. We get it. The idea of it resonates with us because it is truly in alignment with our inner knowing, our God within. Actually living that is another thing altogether.

This is true with a lot of learning perhaps even the majority of the things that we learn in concept, speak of, write of. So many things we can discuss in a lot of detail, but when it comes to actually living it, well, we become forgetful.

Abraham, Esther Hicks is famous for saying, “words do not teach. It is experience that teaches.” Of course, that is true. And so, I continue to choose to engage in practice so that it becomes my experience. Victor Hugo is famous for saying, “There is nothing more powerful than an idea whose time has come.” And, as powerful as that is, it is anemic in comparison to executing that idea through action and thereby becoming experience. We learn by doing more than we learn by thinking or receiving information.

Anyone who has read these Daily Inspirations for any length of time knows that I write about love more than anything else and though I write of it that often, I am more famous for practicing it. I learn about love by loving. I learn about unconditional love by loving without condition. I don't simply share platitudes, but ideas and thoughts that when they become active in our lives change our lives for the better.

This is where practice comes in. With our historical perspective, and seeing popular movies, video games, television shows, and watching people in real life around us, it is easy to see the need for practice and it is easy to see that there isn't much going on in the way of practice but a continuing repetition of the past, adjusted perhaps, but not really different. Jim Rohn is famous for saying, “for things to change, you must change.” I prefer to put that in the first person and say, for things to change, I must change, and change will require practice, especially considering my habitual patterns from history and viewing the history in action that I see all around me.

It is said that practice makes perfect and that is a great truism, yet practice is simply turning an idea into action. As we look around, we can see the manifestation of ideas turned into action and much of that action is based on ideas that were meant to control us and not serve us. The idea of right and wrong, good and bad, sinful and saintly, falling in and out of love, and more. It can be quite a challenge to find a movie that is not about killing or falling in and out of love, broken relationships, greed, revenge, etc. Uplifting movies is not the norm, but what if they were? Loving without condition is not even seen in movies generally, but what if it was?

Yesterday I mentioned a quote from the Paul Selig books that we are not independent of our environment. What that means to me is that whatever environment that I want, I must choose it. I must practice it. If I want to see more unconditional love in the world, then I must learn to practice loving without condition. Mahatma Gandhi is famous for saying, “you must be the change you wish to see in the world.” Again, to put it in the first person and accept the idea, I must be the change I wish to see in the world. Accepting the idea is fine, but for the change to come about, I must practice being the change.

I Am Not Independent Of My Environment. I Am My Environment.

Spread Some Joy Today–by deciding to practice what you want to see in the world.

Forgiveness Is A Stepping Stone

“Forgiveness is not an end,
nor is it resolve; however, 
 it is a worthy stepping stone
on our own journey toward
gratitude, acceptance,
love, and appreciation.” 

— Albert K Strong 

[Classic post from 9-29-14]

As we have been born into and learned from our parents and others, listened and watched the media, discussed events with other people, it is clear that we live in a world filled with duality. This duality is often spoken of in terms of extremes of opposites, such as good and bad, right and wrong, life and death, health and illness. Often, we are taught to become judges and are encouraged to have strong feelings about these extreme choices one way or the other.

I was listening to an Esther Hicks short session the other day where a woman was talking about how she had been betrayed by their lover or spouse. She was quite upset by it, did not understand it, and the more she thought about it and talked about it, the angrier she became. How could she forgive him for hurting her so? But, forgiveness was not the answer.

When I was in my early twenties, I had a good job, but it was entry-level and I was married and just getting by. A relative needed a loan and the only way it would be made was if someone cosigned the loan. I agreed to help. Within just a few months, they defaulted on the loan and the bank turned to me. I accepted responsibility for the debt, but my thoughts were all about what a bad decision I made, how I should have known better, how they shouldn't have done that to me, and so on.

I thought of something funny from Jim Rohn this morning as I was driving. On a tape, he was talking about a guy he knew who was all upset about this other guy lying to him and taking him for some money and how that was terrible, unforgivable, etc. Jim's answer was this: “What did you expect? That's what liars do–they lie! To think otherwise is naive.”

Here's a great piece on forgiveness by Dr. John F. Demartini from his book, The Breakthrough Experience: “Forgiveness is a self-righteous illusion that makes someone bad or wrong and then presumes to judge and pardon. An apology is judging yourself, and both are guaranteed to perpetuate whatever you judge. The only thing that transcends this dynamic is love.”

He goes on to say, “If you can see that everything in your life serves you, that no matter what you've done or not done it's moving you forward, you suddenly see your own perfection and your heart opens–to yourself.”

In addition, Dr. Demartini says, “There exists a hierarchy of emotional responses in life. Fear and guilt are at the bottom of the ladder; above them are faith, acceptance, and forgiveness; and at the top is the present truth of love, appreciation, and wisdom. Forgiveness is a stage on the path, but once you see that everything serves and there is nothing to forgive, it becomes another myth. The truth requires no forgiveness.”

Although on the surface, and from our lifetime of training, it seems illogical and incomprehensible to be thankful and to find gratitude in these kinds of events, this is the ultimate stepping stone to laying the rope down on that subject. With forgiveness, we are still holding the rope, but we have loosened our grip and are giving slack to the opposing force, yet we are ready in a moment's notice to grip it again.

It Is Not About The Other No Matter What They Are Doing Or Not Doing. It Is Always About Us And Our Own Alignment, Which Is Another Way To Say, The Ultimate Answer Is Love. 

Spread Some Joy Today–by finding several things and situations to be grateful for. This will be especially joyous on those subjects that were previously associated with pain or regret.

Am I A Sounding Board For Discontent?

“There is no reason
to deliberately stir up problems
in order to stir up solutions.” 

— Abraham, Esther Hicks 

[Classic post from 4-1-16]

Sometimes a friend, or loved one is, in our opinion, going off course, and we want to be of assistance to help get them back on track. They are focused on problems and we want solutions, but often, the problems are the dominant discussion in our communications with them. It is what is, after all. It is easy to discuss what is. We often call that reality, truth, what is real, what is. Yet, regardless of how adept we get at discussing or analyzing the problem, the solutions can only come by turning away from the problem and on to the potential solutions.

We want to help. It’s a friend. It’s a family member. It’s a loved one. It’s natural to want to help, but again, what is typically done here is discussing the problems at length.

Abraham, Esther Hicks explains, “If you allow yourself to be the sounding board for your friend’s problems, your power of influence will be paltry, and you will be of no value to your friend.” 

“You are of no discernible assistance to your troubled friend unless you are able to focus in the direction of the solution. In the direction of what he wants, or in the direction of what you desire for him. If you are determined to feel good and are able to focus in the direction of improvement for him despite his continual prodding at this problem, your power of influence toward improvement will be powerful.” 

They continue: “It is important to realize that the negative emotion that you often feel when you are worried about a troubled friend is actually present because your focus is pulling you apart from yourself. Your friend may be the reason for your focus, but your friend is not the reason you are pulling against yourself. Your focus is the reason for that. Looking for positive aspects and expecting good outcomes for your friends is the only way you can be of value to them, for there is no action that you can offer that is strong enough to buck your current of negative attention.” 

Without a doubt in me, the most important and depth-reaching part of the Teachings of Abraham is what they call the Emotional Guidance System. In simple terms, when we are feeling positive emotions, we are in alignment with our inner being, the God within, or whatever terminology for that you prefer. They prefer Inner Being just to keep it simple. And, when we are feeling negative emotion, that emotion is an indication of being out of alignment with our Inner Being. You could also use the term Inner Knowing, or God Connection.

Sometimes people say to me that feeling good is not the end-all. No, that would be constant negative emotion. But, what they mean is that the emotions are not a guidance system at all, but only something we feel. Yet, if you were to test it for a time in earnest, I am convinced you will find that what they are teaching and I am expressing is a perfect and accurate description of how to control our own lives, and how to be an influence on others.

When we look at a friend or loved one–in fact, whatever we focus on–will cause us to have thoughts about what we are seeing or experiencing. And those thoughts as compared to our Inner Being’s thoughts about us, are either a match or within a similar vibrational vicinity, or they are not. When they are, we could be said to be following God’s will for us, being guided by Angels, or the Universal Mind. When we are not in alignment, we are resisting, struggling, and the negative emotion we are feeling is that indication.

As we see a friend or relative in a place that looks painful for them, and it is also for us if we focus on where they are, we are pretty much helpless to be of assistance, but when we focus on our own alignment first, as in the airline instructions to put your oxygen mask on first, then help others, we can be of service. Then from our own alignment, we can imagine the friend or loved one in the place that is in their best interests for themselves, or in our best imagining of our vision of that healthy, and joyous, whole person.

As we pay attention to this guidance, our lives get better and better and better, and those around us get better and better and better. Those that don’t, disappear.

Being Helpful Means Focusing On The Help, Not The Hurt. 

Spread Some Joy Today–by creating your own joy, then sharing it with the world around you.

Celebrating Our Abundance!

“In the realm of abundance,
there is no such thing as a fair share.
Heck, there’s no such thing as share.
All there is, is all there is.
There is no need for more,
and no such thing as less.
In fact, there is no need.”

Albert K. Strong

Today is the perfect day and now is the perfect time (now is always the perfect time!) to celebrate your abundance. You can celebrate mine if you like, or others you know, and we will celebrate with you, yet, today and right now it is so important for you to celebrate your abundance. We each have abundance in our lives. We are abundant. Sharing that abundance is what helps others to recognize their own abundance. Let’s make it an abundance-fest!

Not feeling your abundance? The first place to look is your rulebook. We all have rules about abundance. It’s good to look at those rules from time to time. Many of those rules may be clouding your vision. You don’t need glasses or better glasses. No. You probably need to change your rules.

Here’s an idea! Get rid of them entirely! No more rules. No more layers of dogma covering your abundance. Now it will be open and alive and visible to all. Yes! How exciting that is!

Some rules may be that abundance must be a number. Hmm. It is estimated that there are about 30 trillion cells in each of our bodies. Is 30 trillion a good numerical amount? How about 2,190,000? Is that a good numerical amount? That’s how many thoughts most of us have in a year. That’s about 6,000 per day. Whew! Some of us are thinking a lot of thoughts! How about 86,400? Good number? That’s how many seconds each of us has in a day. Wow. A year would be… a big number!

Rules, rules, rules. We create so many rules that limit our possibilities and then complain that we are not getting our share, and in truth, we are all so abundant.

Maybe we think abundance must be prosperity? We are all prosperous as we choose. I love Albert K. Strong’s thought on that: “Prosperity is very simply, and most pleasantly, a state of mind.” That means it is a perspective or a way of looking at things. 

OK. Prosperity. How much love do you have to give? You have an infinite supply! How much kindness do you have available to you? More than you have time to give away. How much joy can you have if you allowed yourself to have joy? Far more than you can possibly spread or feel. 

I recently republished Thomas Troward’s insightful and inspiring piece called The Spirit of Opulence. Here is just a snipit that fits well here:

“If we clearly realize that the creative power in ourselves is unlimited, then there is no reason for limiting the extent to which we may enjoy what we can create by means of it. Where we are drawing from the infinite, we need never be afraid of taking more than our share. That is not where the danger lies. The danger is in not sufficiently realizing our own richness, and in looking upon the externalized products of our creative power as being the true riches instead of the creative power of spirit itself.”

We all have abundance in our lives and it is up to us to recognize and celebrate that abundance. I celebrate your abundance as I celebrate my own. We all live in such an abundant world.

Compassion For All

“Seemingly all of a sudden
I realized that I had the capacity 
to love every person and thing.” 

— Albert K. Strong 

Compassion. It’s a word that is bandied about with ease. And my understanding of the word is different from the definition in the dictionary that I just read: “a feeling of deep sympathy and sorrow for another who is stricken by misfortune, accompanied by a strong desire to alleviate the suffering.” That’s like saying, “I feel sorry for you and your affliction(s), here’s my ten-step method for curing your ills and releasing your suffering.” Silly.

Compassion to me is a grand word, filled with practical and powerful selfless love without any agenda or need of repair. What a radical difference.

I have to share this beautiful and insightful quote by one of my favorite old “new age” thinkers, Albert Einstein.

“A human being is a part of the whole called by us universe, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feeling as something separated from the rest, a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty.” 

I take issue with only one short phrase: “Our task must be to. . .” There really aren’t any rules, and any observant person of the world around us can see that not so many are accepting this task, regardless of the stature of the person suggesting it. No, it’s not a must. It’s a potential choice. I say potential because we can choose yes and we can choose to ignore it completely.

I have been on this journey of learning to make use of what Abraham, Esther Hicks calls the Art of Allowing. This art or activity is the essence of compassion to me. As I allow others to be what they choose for themselves, and as I don’t insist that they be a certain way on my behalf, I am loving them without condition. There is no better way to define the Art of Allowing to me. 

I’ve been practicing for some time now, but it is only in the most recent years that I have taken off the training wheels so to speak. In releasing myself to practice my own version of compassion in the Art of Allowing, and in expressing and feeling unconditional love, I have come so much closer to the person I truly want to be inside and out.

All Relationships Are A Co-Creation

All relationships are always a co-creation. Regardless of the health or longevity of the relationship, both parties, or all parties are involved in one way or another throughout time.

There are always at least two perspectives in a relationship. It will never be one, although certain agreements may exist.

And, in every relationship, we always bring ourselves and all of our accumulated history and knowledge along.

This is why good, effective communication is so important.

There is a lot going on within ourselves, and now in a relationship, there is substantially more that can cause drama and intrigue, as well as love, joy, and freedom.

Trends For 2021 and Beyond

This is an article I wrote that was just published in the FordPros Magazine, of which I've had the honor to be a part of since 2007. Happy New Year!

I’ve got my tinfoil hat on and I’m feeling the energy transfer bringing me magnificent wisdom for the coming year. Here it is: We have to accept and acclimate to the New Normal. That statement should bring some giggles at least. I really don’t know what the New Normal is because I don’t even know what the Old Normal was or what Normal is. I think we just make this stuff up as we go along. There is no such thing because there is one thing that we can bet the farm on: Change is a given! Change is constant. If this is true, how could there be a normal? I’m betting on constant change and not on some version of normal.

So, the trends for next year and beyond is that people and companies will try to determine normal and the New Normal and miss every single time. Predicting change isn’t any easier; however, since change will be unavoidable, it seems to me that finding a way to embrace that is the key to dealing with it in a healthy way.

Here’s some ideas to ponder. Let us all as people and as companies learn how to express rather than to try to impress. Let’s leave our egos in the closet at home and allow our genuine expression to rule. Let us constantly remember that being of service to our customers, the market, our employees, and each other is one of our most important core values. This is another way to express rather than impress. Let us be more kind to everyone including ourselves. Let us learn to drop the rope of resistance. That rope is nothing but stress and a host of negative emotions. It is easier than we could imagine releasing that stress: open hands, let the rope fall to the ground. Next step: Don’t pick it back up! Let us build the best products while paying attention and caring for all who help to make that possible. Let us respect and admire our customers and potential customers by helping them receive the best value and service possible. Let us learn that love in business is not an oxymoron. Let us then bring our love to work and back home again renewed and expanded. Let us release the resistance of fear and fully accept the joy of love. Love will be our highest expression with no need whatsoever to impress anyone.

We can see the room after we’ve turned on the dark switch or we can see the room after we’ve turned on the light. It is always a choice. We are the choosers. We try to see normal where normal is a completely made-up idea, or we can learn to not only embrace change but get excited about it and how we can apply innovation and excellence to meet any and all challenges. Personally, I see a future so bright that it is blinding. I’ll get my sunglasses and join you in the light!

The Gift Of The Moment

“What sweetness you feel when you are touched at the heart level by the beauty of a piece of music and understand what this means. From Andrew Lloyd Weber’s The Phantom of the Opera, the song “All I Ask of You” brings tears to the eyes of lovers. Their hearts are moved and informed by the knowledge of the preciousness of the other person, the fragility of life and their appreciation of this moment in time.

Love brings to the moment its gift of blessing, and in that moment is a knowing beyond knowing, an eternal knowing. This is a glimpse of God’s kingdom on earth. The tender sweetness a mother feels when she holds her newborn child, knowing its preciousness, its innocence, and its vulnerability, is a glimpse of God’s heaven on earth. Honoring the preciousness of another is a heart-knowing act, a moment of God’s informing us of the meaning of love in God’s heaven.

God gently urges us to grow in this love, that we might live more and more in the kingdom of love. This is our highest good. To feel the tenderness of the heart is to recognize the preciousness of the other, and to experience the conscious awareness of this as blessing is to integrate the mind and heart in loving. Gradually, the Holy Spirit grows and strengthens the heart that it may know more and more holy moments in Divine Love.

But lest we become lazy and let time slip by, we should remember the words of William Blake:

We are here for only a little while
to learn to bear the beams of love.

— Donna F. Fletcher
Reflections of the Heart
(Reflection 105)

Love Them As They Are

“You don’t lose power
by loving someone.
You reclaim it.
There is no power you can yield over another,
except that which you imagine…

If you want a happy relationship with anyone,
love them as they are.
You don’t have to do
what you don’t want to do.
But if you deny them love
because they are not meeting your expectation,
you are denying the Divine
not only in them
but in oneself.”

— Paul Selig
Alchemy

The Mule Got Drunk And Lost In Heaven

The
Mind is ever a tourist
Then toss them into an already
Filled closet.

So I craft my words into those guides
That will offer you something fresh
From the Hidden’s Tavern.

Few things are stronger than
The mind’s need for diverse
Experience.

I am glad
Not many men or women can remain
Faithful lovers to the unreal.

There is a kind of adultery
That God encourages:

Your spirit needs to leave the bed
Of fear.

The gross, the subtle, the mental worlds
Become as a worthless husband.

Women need
To utilize their superior intelligence
About love

So that their hour’s legacy
Can make us all stronger and more clement.

Sometimes a poem happens like this one:

The mule I sit on while I recite
Starts off in one direction
But then gets drunk

And lost in
Heaven.

— Hafiz

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